Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Contortion in the Dressing Room

I'm pretty sure no guys read my blog. If you do, consider yourself warned and go read something else. The end.

A couple weeks ago I was complaining about something that had to do with the upper-half undergarments. Bras. The kind that have hooks in the back and 2 straps and so on and so forth. The kind I've always worn. I'm a sports bra virgin. Never worn one. I like my girls nicely supported and snug, and have a specific brand of arbuterus that I prefer to wear. I can't remember what the occasion was, but Daniel said "maybe you should get some sports bras." I hadn't ever considered it. I thought about it, and yesterday decided it was time to venture forth and acquire one or some.

I called 2 of my sisters and got their input and advice on the matter and headed to town. To WalMart. I looked high and low and could not find the sports bras. I finally found a wall of them and they didn't look like squat. Like if I took a pair of granny panties, turned them upside down, made a neck hole and wore them on the top instead of the bottom, I'd get the same effect. I was sad because that meant I'd have to go to a "big" store (read: expensive department store) and spend more money. I was about to leave that section when I stumbled over a second wall of sports bras, these looking more like the real deal.

There were all shapes and sizes. Ones that looked like they would probably work well and others that looked like my girls would either be all sad and droopy or appear like a uni-boob if I made 'em wear that. I picked out a few different ones and headed to the dressing room.

Note: My sisters both strongly suggested that I get racerback, so that's what I picked out.

I got in there and got ready to try the thing on. Uh...how do you do that!?!? It was like trying to climb through a rubber band. The kind that comes around the bottom of the broccoli. Pushing and pulling and praying that I wouldn't rip the thing in the process, I managed to get it on and everything situated. And decided it wasn't one I liked. Then I had to figure out how to GET IT OFF!!! Do I pull it up from the bottom? Do I slide one arm down and through? Will I have to cut it off? I wiggled and pulled and wrestled with my arms and torso going in all different directions and managed to get it off. Like climbing through a rubber band again. Surely the next one will be easier. It was... just a little. I still don't have it mastered. I found one pair that I liked and bought another pair without trying it on. I picked it out after I got out of the dressing room and there was no way I was going back in there. I don't like being that much undressed in public, even it is behind a closed doors.

And so a new chapter of my life begins. The one where sports bras enter the picture. Hopefully I won't dislocate my shoulders or elbows in the process.

8 comments:

Amanda said... [Reply to comment]

Ha Ha! That is so funny! I had the totally opposite experience a couple weeks ago. I had to buy my very first full figured bra at the age of 30 due to pregnancy.

I always wore sports bras from high school on and while I did have a few more dainty pieces of lingere from when I got married, I never even really needed to wear a bra. So this whole new concept where bras have three hooks and cover everything is totally foreign to me! It is nice to know that someone else is experiencing something similar to my discomfort in purchasing bras!

Rachel said... [Reply to comment]

They aren't supposed to be that hard to get on and off. Maybe you had the wrong size. Keep us posted on this. I am not sure why, but I don't like wearing a sports bra in place of a real bra. I like them for running, gym, etc. I don't think they give enough support and climate control for all day at work. Just my opinion.

Sally said... [Reply to comment]

Oh my! Consider yourself fortunate to have even found something that will fit!! Soon before Paul was born, I went shopping for a sports bra to wear in the jacuzzi while laboring. Hahaha! I couldn't find a thing that would come close to fitting, so I got nothing and decided I just have to wear a big T-shirt. As it turned out, laboring in a jacuzzi wasn't in the picture for me at all anyway.

90 Days to 40 Years said... [Reply to comment]

That is funny! I hate bra shopping. For some reason it's never a fun experience.

Kimberly C. said... [Reply to comment]

Great Post. You made me laugh out loud. I am NOT a sports bra fan! Although I do own a couple.

Liz said... [Reply to comment]

Do you have a Target store nearby? In the women's section, where they have exercise wear, they have some great sports bras. They are kind of spendy compared to the ones at Walmart (about $16 each) - but THEY ARE SO WORTH IT!! They support so much better & keep the girls from bouncing all over the place!! I discovered them after I started running & was killing myself wearing my Walmart bras!

Lucy said... [Reply to comment]

I need to hear an update on what you think of these new bras since you have had them for a few days now. I agree with Rach, though, they do not replace real bras. However, I think that Rach forgets that not everyone is blessed with peanuts that don't require much support and that may be why her experiences have not included contortions! lol!

Alyssa said... [Reply to comment]

Hee hee. That made me laugh. Target is a great place for nursing bras when you get to that stage. They have nursing tank tops for half the price of the top of the line ones.